Hi there,

I had to thank Loretta, Lucy, Sophie and Maria!  This mom and daughters came over today and two of the girls watched casey and cody while the other girl and mama attacked our horrifying deck!  It was totally unexpected and a surprise for me to walk out onto our formerly leaf covered, muddy, disgusting deck -- only to see the leaves gone, the deck swept, the patio furniture cleaned, and the barbeque all nice and shiny!  I'd just given up on ever using that space - there was no way we could get to it with all of our life craziness.  Thanks Sassamans!  You rock!!!  And I got to sit and accomplish a million things I haven't had time to get to - paying bills, making phone calls about therapy appointments - I got so much done. 

And two days ago, again to my surprise, I heard some milling around in our front yard.  I looked out the window to see a husband & wife from across the street - along with a neighbor from up the street - pulling up all the Aspen tree plants that had taken over our front yard!  Mind you, we barely know these people!  A few weeks ago when the ambulance came for Cody, our neighbor Gary was outside (you know how neighborhoods gather when an ambulance comes by.)  It was early in the morning and I shouted "we need help!"  He ran over and I said, "can you stay with Casey for an hour until my friend comes over?"  "of course!"  And our friendship was forged.  Since then, he and his wife have been very compassionate toward our crazy life with Cody - and they were the ones who were busy yanking ugly tree starts from all over our front yard!  And they recruited Stan from up the street who I'd never even met! 

It's so humbling to receive so much.  Any shred of pride we had is gone.  As our neighbors attacked our front yard, I sat watching from our window above them.  I couldn't come out to thank them because Cody was on his 4th seizure and passed out in my arms.  I wanted to run down and say, "you don't have to do this!  I'm sure you have better things to do!  Please don't feel obligated to do this!"  But all I could do is watch them hard at work - for us.  Humbling. 

Do I do that for people?  Well, maybe I have an excuse right now because of our life condition - but did I do that for people before Cody?  I doubt it.  At least not incredibly often.  I wish I had.  I wish I'd looked for families with kids who are sick - and lavished them with meals, yard work, errands.  I was single for so long and had only myself to worry about.  I wish I'd know then what I know now -- that dropping off a meal or pulling some weeds - makes life so much better and easier for someone who is in dire straights. 

I pray for a time in our lives when we can give back.  When I can take notice of someone in need and just show up to help - unsolicited - happy to oblige - and bless them the way we've been blessed so often.  Another thing I've learned - is that when people say "let us know if there's ANYTHING we can do..."  I don't.  Although I know they are so sincere, and they truly want to help, it's just so NOT human nature to randomly call someone and say, "I thought of something you can do for me!"  Here's what I have found (being so often on the "receiving end" of things.)  My friend Carol is the perfect example:  She left me a phone message and said, "I like to clean.  And I'd like to come over every other week for 2 hours and clean your house.  I think that might bless you.  I know you might want to resist it or feel bad about it - but I want you to know this will bless me to do this for you.  So unless you really object, I'm going to plan on it.  You just tell me what day is good, and I'll show up.  You don't even have to be there.  Will that be okay?   

I'll never forget that message.  And she shows up faithfully every other week to this day.  It so hit the nail on the head.  She came up with something specific she could give and feel good about giving - she offered it with a specific time frame and a specific description - she didn't want to even hear my protestations (and mind you if she hadn't phrased it just the way she did, I would have launched into "NO WAY will I let you come over and clean my toilets!  That is so sweet of you to offer but that's just too much - I just can't let you do it.")  And she makes me feel (and I actually have come to believe this is true for Carol) that she loves doing it and is totally blessed by it.  And in the process we've become good friends - and we're even going to Women of Faith together this weekend! 

My friend Kim is really good at this too - she sends an email or phone message saying "can I bring a meal over this Friday?"  That's a lot different than "let me know if you ever need a meal."  Because that leaves the ball in my court and it's just too darn embarrassing to call and ask people for things.  But a simple question like "I'd like to bring a meal over this week - I'm cooking the same thing for my familiy and will just make extras" is so perfect.  I have another friend Mili who occasionally calls and says, "I've got that feeling again - that feeling that God is prompting me to cook for you!  I have time to do it Monday - can I drop by some food on Tuesday?"  I LOVE THAT!  These people have kept us afloat.  Not just with their meals and help - but by continually showing me that we are not alone in this.  It is a message the Lord delivers to my doorstep almost every day in the form of an email, a friend coming to help, a neighbor pulling weeds -- and I see His fingerprints all over these acts. 

Back to Loretta - who I began this blog with today.  She pretty much said many months ago, "I want to come over twice a week and help you.  Tuesdays and Thursdays work for me and I can be there from about 10am to 2pm.  It was so specific - and open ended - and she has done exactly that for months.  She has become someone who was meant to be in my home on so many divinely appointed occasions.  When my internet was down and I was going crazy, Loretta (of course) says "I used to work for the phone company - here's what you need to say."  When my cell phone pooped out, she said, "I have an extra one of my kids phones at home, I'll bring it Thursday."  She noticed I have no "scrubbies" as she calls them - I am a paper towel person, not a sponge person - and she noticed some things need more scrubbing than a paper towel can do.  So she brought over a "scrubbie" the other day along with some kind of soap she said I needed.  She has gone outside and detailed my car on occasion (and by "detailed" please don't picture her putting turtle wax on my tires.  Instead, it's more like scraping dried cheerios off the seat...scrubbing ketchup off the ceiling...vacuming unknown pieces of something-or-other from the floor.  It's hideous and she actually volunteers and I actually let her!  Boy have I come a long way!  :)  She watches Casey so I can do the laundry or take a shower.  She reorganized my medicine cabinet so things were in little containers according to the ailment.  What would lead a person to be that consistent presence in my life - twice a week - getting nothing out of it herself?  Again, I say it's really the Lord who shows up on Tuesdays and Thursdays disguised as Loretta.  :)   He shows me every time she walks in with a latte, or a cell phone, or a scrubbie that He is attending to my needs through His people.  Loretta's just chosen to listen to His prompting.  Plus, she's a hoot.  Her opening line to me today was, "I just found out from my Uncle that we're not Mexican!"  She was distraught.  And this is a woman who exudes her Mexican heritage from her head to her toes.  She speaks to her kids in Mexican, she cooks Mexican, she grew up in a Mexican neighborhood.  I said, "noooooooooooooooo!  So what are you?"  "BASQUE!!!!" she said.  We died laughing.  "You don't have one shred of Mexican in your genes?"  "not ONE!," she said.  She's now having an identity crisis.  I am still laughing about it.

These are the stories of my life - of some of the people who are demonstrating God's love to me on a daily basis.  Almost all of them go to my church.  And if you don't have a home church and live near the Eastside, oh please pay us a visit at Calvary Chapel Eastside in Bellevue (www.calvarychapeleastside.com.)  It is a church family who truly understand and demonstrate the love of Christ to each other. 

And please don't thing this blog entry was a solicitation for help for our family.  It's not.  It's more a tribute to those people who step in - and some insights I've learned from the "receiver's" end of things. 

That's it for now - gotta put the boys to bed.  Thank you for visiting - we so appreciate it.

love, Shawna